12/30/2004

Dude, you got a light?

How many more times do we have to watch those "smoking is bad for you" commercials?

The people behind these ad campaigns believe if kids only knew smoking was bad, they'd quit smoking, or never start in the first place.

Newsflash: they already know it's bad. That's why they do it!

Teens are young and feisty, and they want to rebel. So they take up smoking. How do you expect rebellious teens to express their angst -- by eating all their vegetables at dinner? "I don't care what you say, Pop. I'm going to eat all this cauliflower and broccoli. You just try to stop me."

You'll never stop teens from doing the wrong thing by reminding them it's the wrong thing to do.

I say we flip the script (a little ghetto-speak, there) on these teens. Use a little reverse-psychology. Convince them smoking is good. Tell them tobacco is chock full of vitamins. Encourage them to ask "What Would Jesus Smoke?" Tell them they can't eat supper or watch MTV until they rip through a pack of Marlboro Reds.

In two weeks every teen in the country will quit smoking, cold turkey.


2 comments:

Ethereal Darkness said...

That's a God damn good idea, but we shouldn't encourage anyone to watch MTV. MTV is fucking gay.

Jack Mercer said...

Those tobacco cos. are smarter than we think they are... Curse them!