1/11/2005

Crumbs from the cookie jar of my conscience

  • The world has enough perfectionists, so I've become a mediocrotist.
  • Good news. My wife is considering massage therapy school. I told her that with a little hard work, she can be the next Amber Frey.
  • If you think about it, fog is just Mother Nature's flatulence.
  • Here's a good insult if you need it: "Did your parents have sex near a nuclear power plant?"
  • Some people tell me, "You can't do anything about it, so there's no point in worrying." Really? You mean I'm completely powerless to prevent the thing from happening? I feel better already. Thanks. You're a regular Tony Fuckin' Robbins.
  • The day you master Life's Lessons is the day life presents you with Life's Exceptions. Incidentally, that's why you're "never too old to learn." No matter how old you are, you don't know shit.
  • Sushi is gross. And the people who advise me to "start with California Rolls" should know that I don't like California and I'm merely indifferent to rolls.

3 comments:

Rachel Nicole said...

Why don't you like California??

Yeah, that's what my friend says about UoPhoenix; he's majoring in some sort of math, I think. Do you still live around there?

Jack Mercer said...

Ha! What a question...why don't you like California...

That's a blog in itself, isn't it, Dude!

Veggie said...

Killer insult! Woo! :)

"You're so ugly it looks like your mother put out the crib fire with a rake!"

"Wow! You're the abortion that made it!"

Much love to the Bug-a-boo. :)