2/04/2005

The 2005 Lexus Crapper BM series

With all the amenities coming standard in today's automobiles (e.g., GPS, climate control, television, etc.), I'm surprised they don't offer an in-car restroom. After all, you're already sitting down. Why not install a shitter in the chair? I talk on the phone in the car; I talk on the phone while on the shitter. Why not talk on the phone in the car on the shitter? Efficiency.

An on-board crapper would be a good marketing tie-in with those 100 oz. drink holders that now come standard in most automobiles. Take it from me. If you're drinking that much Dr. Pepper, you're gonna need a restroom break.

And think of the fun you could have when the police pull you over:

"Do you know how fast you were going?"

"No faster than usual. I usually just let it flow naturally."

"What? I asked you how fast you were going?"

"Going? Well, uh. Let's see. I finished pinching a dookie on 29th street. Then I had a tinkle. I'd say, uh... 3 minutes. Was I going too fast, officer?"

As long as I've descended to potty humor and automobiles, I've got to ask about "traveller's diahrrea." When I have diahrrea, I can only travel about 15 feet from the toilet and still feel safe. They should call it, "homebody's diahrrea."

8 comments:

Nettie said...

Why not indeed?

Stace said...

First time visitor. I must say that was funny stuff. You have a good idea though, you might wanna patent it before some shmo, comes along and takes it and then makes millions off the idea.

Teaspoon said...

would it be like a full on flushing toilet with a drainable tank? or outhouse style and the I-5 suddenly is even more messy and stinky?

Wyatt Junker said...

I absolutely despise shitting in traffic.

Punkin said...

I wonder why this wasn't one Leonardo DaVinci's big ideas...

Lizabeth said...

As long as you're not constipated in traffic. Then everyone would probably now what that shit pushin' face was all about.

Useful Idiots said...

Sittin on a crapper in your car would give rearender a hole new meaning. I think ya better run this crapper idea by JM.

Sharon said...

I have been wanting this in my car for the longest time. I have to drive an hour and a half to take my kids to the pediatrician and I ALWAYS have to stop halfway between here and there to make a pit stop. I hate it. It would be so much easier if they just had a toilet built into the front seat. If RV's can have toilets, why can't cars?
Bravo, I applaud this concept. Market it. Make a mil.