3/01/2005

8-legged frogs

How come the only creatures who suffer genetic mutations from environmental polution are frogs? Every year or so you see another picture in the paper of a frog with 3 or 4 extra arms protruding from the thorax. And the look on the frog's face is like, so what do you want from me, you warm-blooded SOB?

I think it would be cool if humans were lucky enough to mutate like that. I know I could use an extra arm or two, especially at work. Imagine yourself cooking in the kitchen; you'd always have a free hand to stir the pasta. And think how good you'd be at volleyball with an extra set of hands. Plus, think how many tattoos you could get. I could use the extra real estate, what with all the tribal bands and naked lady tattoos.

That Buddah guy's got like 8 arms or something, and he seems pretty happy about it. He's always smiling on those statue replicas. I think we'd all have something to smile about if we had 8 arms. And with enough environmental abuse, I'll bet we get there someday.

3 comments:

nongirlfriend said...

How about eight dicks? I'd pay to see that.

Sean said...

...and eight arms to masterbate the eight dicks. Talk about multiple orgasm, I'd be a walking sperm bank!

Useful Idiots said...

hey Bug where did ya see Buddha with eight arms ? He just has two . Ya lookin for a flamiing immolation on your doorstep ? Ya got the Bud mixed up with that Hindu Kali chick. Her devotees like to strangle folks instead of puttin money in the collection plate. Best you stay away from them oriental religions eh.