5/20/2005

Hot off the LBB Wires...


LBB Wires, Tucson, AZ 1653 hrs...

LBB reporters have learned of a pending lawsuit filed by Victoria Secret catalog models against the publishers of dozens of magazines and broadcast media. The models, estimated to be in the hundreds in the class-action suit, allege the defendants published pictures of the models wearing nothing but underwear, an act defying Geneva Conventions. The plaintiffs' legal team has enumerated several undergarments featured in various magazines and television commercials along with when and where the images were published. Pentagon officials have withheld comment.

Legal experts believe an unauthorized Saddam Hussein photo hitting newsstands around the world and Hussein’s lawsuit have given momentum to underwear-clad victims around the world. The question “Boxers or Briefs?” is no longer the stuff of speculation regarding the fallen Iraqi leader. Evidently, the mystique was a matter of the despot’s personal dignity. Damages are estimated to be in the “tens of millions.”

Also joining the Victoria Secret class-action lawsuit, Marky Mark (real name, Mark Wahlburg), who alleges pictures of him sporting fitted boxer brief underwear were plastered on billboards everywhere. According to legal documents, several of these images reveal parts of “the funky bunch.”

Legal experts expect the VS lawsuit to invoke Geneva Conventions prohibiting pictures of POWs in unflattering lighting or wardrobe.

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